My last post was pretty depressing but I’m glad I captured that moment. Obviously we can snap out of feeling sorry for ourselves if we give it a bit of time. I have a pattern of feeling sad, but I also have a pattern of feeling fulfilled and grateful for who I am. It goes in a cycle and I’m not embarrassed to admit to it.

I’m not really depressed. I don’t think anyone really is. It’s a state of mind that you control — it just depends on your habits and patterns that seem to define you. I don’t think any one feeling defines a person, it’s a pattern that defines them and creates a vibe and character. You can change patterns and that shift may feel difficult at first, but if you get into a habit of shifting patterns, you’ll snap into a new pattern that is much more gratifying. You’ll feel more in control of your actions and find it easier to battle previous patterns that lead to your negativity.

No, it doesn’t happen over night — not an easy fix or a pill you take. Your body and mind operate unconsciously and at times you may feel like you have no control, no choice, no possible way out. But you must always know that you can be more conscious of what your mind and body do together to make a pattern in your actions. Once you face that on your own, you will see that it’s all really a story you made up and you’re living the life of the most perfect character in that story. So maybe you should make up a new story that you enjoy more, and start making your patterns to fit that character. Page by page, paragraph by paragraph, word by word: no need to skip chapters and jump to the ending.

I’ll try it Ghazaleh